Consider these statistics:
- Fifty-four million Americans - one out
of every four - were cared for by family or friends last
year.
- Four out of ten caregivers looked after
someone round the clock.
- Three out of ten caregivers have been
doing it for more than a decade.
Paid home care is the exception, not
the rule. Through their compassion, volunteer caregivers
of chronically ill or disabled family members enable frail
loved ones to remain in the comforting familiar surroundings
of home. They are on call seven days a week, despite additional
demands of career and family, and they often ignore their
own needs while ministering to others. Even well intentioned
caregivers who are motivated by love and generosity of spirit
can experience stress, loneliness and depression.
Author Nancy Mace in her book THE 36-HOUR
DAY advises, "Taking time out away from the care of
the person can be the single most important thing you can
do to make it possible to continue caring for that person."
Think of it as a balanced equation: a sick person's well-being
depends on that of the caregiver. When a caregiver exhausts
their own physical and emotional resources, the person needing
care will suffer too.
Because of the high emotional demands put
on them, one third of all caregivers describe their own
health as fair to poor. Many feel overburdened, trapped
and isolated. Up to 60% show signs of depression. Life for
caregivers of the chronically ill is a demanding and open-ended
job.
Fortunately there is help out there. In
1993 the Family and Medical Leave Act was passed, ensuring
that businesses recognize employee needs for leave to provide
family care to elders. The National Family Caregiver Support
Program (NFCSP) calls on states to provide access to training,
counseling, and support groups for caregivers, as well as
respite care programs that offer temporary relief from caregiving
responsibilities.
The word respite comes from the Latin RESPECTUS,
meaning "refuge." Respite care programs are perhaps
the most important piece in relieving the anxiety and pressure
that builds in caregivers' lives. Respite comes in many
forms: adult day services, short stays in nursing homes
or assisted living facilities, or funding for a home health
aide, companion or private nurse.
Respite can be as short as the time it takes
for a caregiver to go shopping, attend church, or enjoy
dinner and a movie with friends. It can be as extensive
as arranging for care while the primary caregiver takes
a needed vacation. By addressing the need for temporary
relief, respite allows caregivers to break the cycle of
physical and mental strain that at times is overwhelming.
A caregiver daughter in Windsor County, Vermont reported,
"I am doing a good job caring for my father, but confess
I am exhausted. I don't know how much longer I can keep
up this pace. Being able to get out of the house and relax
would really help."
The benefits of respite programs are
obvious, but many caregivers make the mistake of waiting
too long to access the services. It is necessary to
get sufficient and regular amounts of respite early on in
order to avoid burn-out and its serious health and psychological
effects. When used for a change of scene or routine, respite
allows caregivers to return refreshed and provide the kind
of quality care they want to give.
Some important tips for caregivers:
- Consider a team approach. You may be
the primary caregiver but think of other family members
and friends to call on to relieve you or help with small
tasks.
- When you ask for help remember that what
may feel like a big request to you may actually be just
a small favor that will enable someone else to feel part
of the caregiving process.
- When people offer to help, be specific
about what they can do - weed the garden, watch the person
needing care for one hour a week, run specific errands.
- Get enough sleep and make time to for
regular exercise - it's a great stress reliever.
- Join a caregiver support group.
- Don't wait until you feel overwhelmed
to seek help.
If you need information about caregiving
and local respite care options, call the Senior Help-Line
at the Council on Aging for Southeastern Vermont (1-800-642-5119).
An advocate can tell you about Meals on Wheels, Respite
Care Grants, exercise programs, counseling services for
elders, long term care options, how to find used medical
equipment, and contacts for Adult Day Services and Caregivers
Support programs. The Council on Aging for Southeastern
Vermont has a wonderful Respite Care Grant program that
provides funds that may be used by a caregiver as well as
the person needing care. Grants can be used to pay for weekends
away, private caregiving services, and more. Call the Senior
Help-Line for details and eligibility requirements.
There is a world of assistance out there.
Pick up the phone, ask questions and don't hesitate to ask
for help - for yourself or for the loved one you are caring
for.
Useful Resources:
